I am upset.
Not terribly – not yet, that is.
But the business I work for pays a large sum of money to your business each month, Acme Lead Management Software. I usually enjoy using your product but today I think I have decided that I will be frustrated.
See, the problem is that I, Kent Richardson, normally arrive to my office, Gorman Industry & Futures, by 7:45am – first in the door – throw my coat across my seat and go to turn on that new jamocha maker we recently bought. Old Gorman is, to be sure, a grumpy boss but he listens to his employees when they complain sufficiently.
I quickly ensconce to my office to enjoy the thirty or so minutes of quiet before the harum-scarum atmosphere swallows my peaceful morning. I have work to get done. Having worked here for 15 years I am second or third in command. This depends upon the day, sometimes the hour. Gorman is past retirement age but shows no signs of slowing down. That being said he “plans” to retire in three months. Yesterday Gorman himself asked me to personally handle a few special matters for the company.
The first involves hopping on the internet and logging into your web application. I need to generate two reports, download them and produce a singular sales lead projection for the next quarter.
From memory I enter my username and password and click ‘Submit’. Strange, the web application does not let me in. Instead, an error message appears, ‘Your Username or Password is Incorrect, please try again’. I try again with the same result. This is a problem.
But there is a bigger problem.
I am not Kent Richardson.
The above were all lies, a cover story, and I am just warming up. I have done my research. Old Gorman exists. His son-in-law is second or third in command. He married Old Gormans daughter 10 years ago after working at the company five years. There is a jamocha maker. I know they bought one but I have never seen it, just the receipt. So this is my own interpretation of what it might look like. That’s just me.
There is no reports that require immediate attention from me. There are no ‘next quarter’ projections to work up.
I am in the trust business.
Gaining it dishonestly that is. Sort of a conundrum, gaining trust dishonestly, huh? But don’t think about that too long or else you will miss the confidence scheme I am about to pull off.
See, I am many miles away in a distant time zone. But Old Gorman is going to get ripped off.
Flawlessly I might add. There will be no peaceful day today for Old Gorman and the next many weeks will wreak havoc on his staff, business and bottom line.
I call the next part of the series “You, Socially Hacked – Part II: ‘Thanks For The Info’”.